Lessons in Projection

As a healer, teacher, or any type of spiritual worker, one of the defining features of your relationships is going to be PROJECTION.

It has been realllly challenging in my life when people I feel like I’ve grown close to snap and turn away suddenly because I have not lived up to their projected image of me.

I am slowly learning that what I consider a deepening relationship can, in fact, just be projection, and it is painful every time the connection suddenly slams shut.

It has taken me a long time to learn that I am simply a person who draws it in by the nature of the work I do, and it is a continued process to learn how to not take it personally, and release with love.

I have also learned that I am not the only one. When you commit to this work, it’s part and parcel to it!

It has taken me even longer to learn that the projection I elicit from those around me is a divine gift for the person doing the projecting: they are seeing their own reflection in me. All the wonderful things they see in me is the divine image of their own wonderful selves. I love beaming that back at people.

By the same token, the triggers, anger, and even rage that can come at me at the drop of a dime are also their own reflection. They are seeing in themselves the places that divine spirit needs them to heal.

So you see, projection becomes the deepest gift you unwittingly give to another: the opportunity to see themselves embodied in you.

The fact that they don’t see it is themselves yet is not your problem: sometimes you are the one to help them crack open. Sometimes you are a stepping stone on their path to awakening. Embrace your role, and move on.

The gift for those of us on the receiving end of projection is learning non-attachment in our process. We get to show up with an open heart, full of love, and let the relationship go where it may, without taking it all so damn personally.

And it’s a hell of an ego adjustment too, which you know you need if you’re getting it!

All my love,


Comments 1

  1. beautifully said! thank you! its a place i find myself in more often than i would like with people. after internalizing it, in an effort to take ownership and transmute, i found times where that didnt work. that a greater job was taking place and that i had to come into the “impersonality of self” i call it. So, thanks again for touching my heart, im not alone out here!

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